hire me

Becomming an Elusive Object of Desire.

By Katie Barber,posted on October 31, 2018

The laws of human nature., covetousness.

Latest book by Robert Greene – The Laws of Human Nature

Greene published a new book this week, entitled The Laws of Human Nature. I was very excited that he has written in depth about desirability and has critiqued current marketing. Particularly social media marketing, as being obvious and weak. People are just blasting out a brand message over and over, hoping and even just expecting, that people will take an interest. If you’d like to buy the book, you can do so here. I highly recommend it. If you’re already a Greene fan, it’s a must read.

Using social media isn’t enough – it has to be used well.

There is too much focus in marketing on the platform. Social media, email, Facebook ads, these are only mediums. Each campaign should have a focus on actual, real business growth. Getting inside the heads of real customers and finding out how to appeal to them. Yes, some people struggle to use Facebook and LinkedIn. But basic training of how to use these platforms is not going to increase conversions, brand awareness and desirability without knowledge or talent about how to sell and persuade.

I have written some notes and quotes that summarise Robert Greene’s chapter about stimulating desire. I hope you find it as useful as I have.

The law of covetousness. 


Quotes from The Laws of Human Nature:

“The problem we face today is not that people have suddenly stopped coveting, quite the opposite. But we are losing our connection to this art (of persuasion) and the power that goes with it. We see evidence of this in our culture. We live in an age of bombardment and saturation. Advertisers blanket us with their messages and brand presence, directing us here and there to click and buy.

… But they have no sense of how to spark our imagination about the future. … Subtlety is sacrificed and all of this has a hardening effect on our imaginations, which secretly crave something else.

More and more people have come to believe that people should simply desire them for who they are, this means revealing as much as they can about themselves, exposing all of their likes and dislikes and making themselves as familiar as possible. They leave no room for imagination or fantasy.

Increasingly self-absorbed, we find it harder than ever to get into the psychology of the other person, to imagine what they want from us, instead of what we want from them.

… Understand, people may point to all of this that humans are becoming more honest and open, human nature does not change within a few generations. People have become more honest and forthright, not out of some deep moral calling, but out of increasing self-absorption and overall laziness. It requires no effort to simply ‘be oneself’ or to ‘blast one’s message’. And the lack of effort simply results in a lack of effect on other peoples psychology. It means that peoples interest in you will be paper thin. Their attention will quickly move on and you will not see the reason for this. Do not swallow the easy moralism of the day which urges honesty at the expense of desirability.

Go in the opposite direction. With so few people out there who understand the art of desirability, it affords you endless opportunities to shine and exploit peoples repressed fantasies.”

Strategies for stimulating desire:


“You believe people should like and respect you for who you are. You believe what you produce should naturally excite people, after all, you spent a lot of effort on making it. But others see none of this, as another person you either entice curiosity, or indifference and even hostility.”

  • Know how and when to withdraw. Your presence should have a touch of coldness to it as if you could easily do without. Add to this a bit of blankness and ambiguity about who you are. Your values and tastes should never be too obvious. This gives people room to read into you how they want. Create an air of mystery, and attract interpretations. Physical withdrawing, being unavailable for days or weeks will create space for people to want to go after you. They will want more of you, not less. Creating ambiguous content that people have to work out themselves, or use their imagination for, will give people a sense of satisfaction. Think jokes that take a while to work out. Or films that can be interpreted in several different ways.
  • Create rivalries for attention. Put simply, we value attention more if we have to work to obtain it. And we are attracted to things that other people want. This starts with our parent’s affection through sibling rivalry and continues throughout our lives. When we see things or people desired by other people, it creates a deep want in us. Learn how to show that you are desired by other people and that people have to compete for your attention.
  • Increased visibility of our every movement, due to widespread social media usage has created a lot of restrictions on what we can do and say. Political correctness has always existed, but it has become stricter in the present day. Creating something transgressive can be very appealing. Greene uses the example of Coco Chanel and how she created products that were rebellious against gender roles. Using contrast against the stuffiness of previous generations can also work very well. Stimulate illicit desires in people like voyeurism. Share secrets and present your work as new and unconventional.
  • Life is full of limitations. Becoming rich and successful takes a tremendous amount of effort. We can’t spend all of our time exactly as we wish. Every day we get older. We lose our physical health and beauty. And one day we face the inevitable limitation of death. We naturally desire to be free of these limitations. And so anything that promises us freedom from the mundane limitations we face will be greatly desired.
Get the book here –
Trending Today FREE Trello Board for Content Creators. Mega List – Where to Find Authoritative Sources for Your Content. Persuasion Techniques in Marketing – Cognitive Bias D-H Best Practices for Setting Up Targeted Facebook Ads

Get in touch





Contact me

Phone : 07432298140

Email :

my Hours

MON-FRI 09:00 – 18 pm

Follow me Twitter Linkedin